Yep, two posts in one day. I am feeling called to ask for some prayers. I don't know who will see this, or when, but God has shown me this morning that I could use some prayers from my community.
For the past week, I have had one of the worst allergy attacks of my life. I am used to allergies. I have had them for years, they are bad every spring, I take a variety of drugs to ward off the worst symptoms and wait them out until the pollen and all that craziness has died down and I get back to normal. This year they have been particularly bad though, maybe because I can't take any of my usual cocktail of OTC drugs. I have been miserable, not sleeping, and keeping poor Michael up in the process. At my doctor appointment this week I asked him about it and he prescribed a nasal spray that he assured me would not affect that baby at all, but would help me. I then went through 24 hours of struggling with whether that was true, should I take it or just suffer through for the good of the baby. I don't want to do anything that might hurt our child, but I realized that that attitude was not about protection for the baby, but was more about me living in fear. If I truly believe that God is all-powerful and that he is knitting this child together and knows all about him, then surly I can trust Him to not let this medication have any effect on my child. I had to come to grips with that, and repend to the Lord of my spirit of fear and recommit to living my life in Him and trusting Him.
This all happened last night. Then this morning, in reading the blog of a wise friend, it hit me that I need to pray to be delivered from these allergies. I have been praying that my child will not be afflicted with allergies, but I did not pray to God to take them away from me. Why not? Because I have had them all my life, I am used to them, I expect them? Is it worse than that? In some way do I enjoy the 'suffering' or my husband feeling bad for me? I pray to God for deliverance for the 'big things' that occur in life - do I not consider this a 'big thing?' The more I have thought about it, I believe these allergy attacks come from the devil. God doesn't want me suffering and miserable. He doesn't want me feeling like I need to be confined indoors instead of out enjoying his nature during this beautiful time of year. He doesn't want me sick or suffering, any more than I want my baby sick or suffering. I am His child and He wants good things for me.
So, I am praying. Better late than never, I am asking God to deliver me from the allergies. Not because I am fearful of the medicine, but because I believe that is what He wants, and I want to be in His will, I want to reflect Him image. Will you join me in that prayer, for deliverance from my allergies, and anything that may be holding you back in your life that you haven't recognized as such?